These rules are not branding. They are how this project stays from becoming the thing it exists to refuse: a public grievance a child will one day read as their childhood.
1. The child in eight years is the reader
If a young person from a family like these found a page at sixteen, would they feel protected or recruited? If recruited, the page does not ship. Named or anonymous does not change the test.
2. No identifiers
No names, ages, schools, counties, dates of incidents, docket numbers, screenshots, or portraits that only fit one household. No “she always…” that is actually a person. Composite means blended: several families, published research, and interior life. Never a play-by-play of a case.
3. Own the 11:40 text
When we write about rage, over-giving, or ugly replies, we write the pattern, including the narrator’s. Pain does not confer a license to become the other recruiter.
4. Hybrid, not dogma
Alienation is one cause of resist/refuse dynamics. Others include justified estrangement, enmeshment, child temperament, triangulation, and a parent who made contact harder by raging at the gate. We will not pretend Gardner’s “PAS” is a settled DSM diagnosis. We will name the counter-literature: some protective parents are falsely labeled alienators. A serious site can hold both.
5. Not advice
Nothing here is legal advice, a diagnosis, or a treatment plan. Law is literacy, not a playbook. Psychology is a map, not a verdict on your house. Get licensed people for your facts.
6. Kids’ pages last, and never a letter to your kids
Age-banded writing for children may exist later, clinician-read, with comments off. It will not be a public letter to anyone’s actual children. It will not ship until these rails are muscle memory.
7. No rage forum
No comments. No unmoderated “share your story.” An unmoderated dad-forum will eat the mission. A contact path, if it exists, will say: I am not your lawyer or therapist, and I cannot take your case facts.
8. Counsel before a public sentence
If you are building a sister project from a live coparenting or criminal
matter, a family-law attorney should read the constitution and the essays
before anything is promoted from a personal account. Search engines are
allowed to index. Flip INDEXABLE in src/site.ts
to false if you need them off again.
9. Both houses
Bond-breaking is not a maternal specialty. The first doorway is for targeted parents, many of them fathers, because that is the disappearance we know from the inside. The second doorway is for aligned parents who might recognize a sentence. Neither doorway is a gender war.
10. One-way rules are in scope
A climate of contempt, a radio that only transmits, a calendar used as a leash, a portrait that will not update — these are not “both people” in the ordinary sense. Naming them is allowed. Using the child as the exhibit of them is not. The test in §1 still holds.